Post 19 in Lifting up the Soul
For thy name’s sake, O Jehovah,
Pardon mine iniquity, for it is great. Psalm 25:11
When Nathan came to David about his sins of adultery and murder, David listened to him as a judge and king would listen to his servant the prophet. Nathan introduced David’s offense by telling him of a man whose ewe lamb was stolen from him and killed. Then the prophet clarified the king’s position before God—that God had every right to be fiercely angry because of David’s selfish and cruel behavior. This is when David’s position changed. He no longer listened as a judge; he listened as a servant. David told Nathan, “I have sinned against the LORD” (2 Samuel 12:13). David saw his true position then. He had committed crimes he couldn’t undo. He’d committed adultery, taking another man’s wife for his own, and he’d taken the life of an innocent man, a man who had been a faithful servant. David begged God to pardon him.
The word for “iniquity” in verse eleven of Psalm 25 is also translated “guilt.” The original word meaning includes the picture of a judge passing a guilty verdict. It includes words like “depravity” and “corruption.” Nathan’s approach of telling David his own sin by presenting it as someone else’s sin gave David the opportunity to pass the guilty verdict on himself. He was made his own judge and condemned himself.
Iniquity is not only the wrongdoing itself; it is the building corruption that forms from that wrongdoing. Iniquity spawns evil offspring by growing greater. When we consider David’s sin in this light, the punishment of losing his child, his offspring, reflects the cutting off of evil that had spawned in David’s heart as he went from bad to worse in his dealings with Bathsheba. David’s child was not evil, but David’s works were evil.
When a person is mired in iniquity, she will not always know where it all started. Guilt is a punishing feeling that those in iniquity try to avoid by embracing more iniquity. But guilt is meant to stop iniquity in its tracks. Its purpose is to bring one to remorse and then to repentance. It is a good tool when it brings distress to a person to push them into changing their wrong behavior.
Guilt can be overwhelming. Peter felt so guilty for denying Christ that he cried bitterly (Matthew 26:75). But Peter returned from that crisis of guilt with a stronger resolve to serve his Lord. In the heat of a struggle with sin, Satan will use guilt to push us toward iniquity—that endless web of sin. David shows us how to use guilt wisely. Guilt is the push to go to God and beg for His forgiveness. A penitent heart can always seek God’s mercy to wipe the slate clean. His purpose is to grow us, not bury us under guilt. You are his choice bloom, a fragile flower that needs God’s constant care. Admitting we are wrong and asking God to pardon us is a healthy reminder that we can do nothing without our Creator to lead us. But guilt is not a feeling that is meant to be carried to the grave. It’s meant to move the heart to change and keep us from eternal death.
The account of David and his sin with Bathsheba brings a student of God’s word to wonder what Bathsheba’s part in this sin was. Bathsheba had very little power and no authority. Could she have rejected the king’s advances? There is very little information here, except to see that God through Nathan expresses condemnation on David. Nathan explains that his story about the ewe lamb is about David taking Uriah’s wife and then Uriah’s life (2 Samuel 12:7-9). Bathsheba’s guilt or condemnation are not mentioned. Did Bathsheba feel guilt for not telling her husband the truth about her pregnancy? Did she feel guilt in having a sexual relationship with the king when he commanded her to come to him? If guilt is a feeling that stirs us to be remorseful and to change our behavior, what did Bathsheba repent of? Whatever her sin was, hers was not David’s sin. Further, Bathsheba was punished by losing her husband and her son. There is an underlying reminder in this account that iniquity affects and demeans others. It causes others to endure pain and loss.
Bathsheba’s situation also reminds us that it is not our job to take on the guilt of the sins of others. Any guilt we feel after repenting and asking God to pardon us for our own sin in a situation is guilt that can stop our progress. God warns us that we can feel misplaced guilt. 1 John 3:20 speaks of the heart condemning when God does not condemn. God is the one who pardons our sins. A Christian’s job is to keep His covenant and His testimonies, not to keep any guilt that has already been pardoned.
Some young wives implore their husbands to give up looking at pornography; and when the situation doesn’t change, they resort to blaming themselves for their husband’s sin. “I should have been more active in our marriage bed. I should have spent more time with him so that he wouldn’t look somewhere else.” This is not logical thinking, and unfortunately, women in the Church succumb to this false judgment almost unanimously. Even if a woman set out to cruelly manipulate her husband by depriving him of her love, sexually or emotionally, his decision to sin through pornography or some other means is his sin. Not hers. If she denies her affections as a means of manipulating him, she has sinned in her own cruel heartsickness. In this way, her sin can tempt him to sin, but it does not mean her sin is his sin. When Eve tempted Adam to sin, Eve was punished for that separately from Adam’s sin.
When an engaged woman knows her intended’s past sins and weaknesses, she must consider herself from the perspective of her soul’s safety. Will she be able to remain in Christ and seek first God’s kingdom if she marries the man? All of us who are married have come to this crossroads and asked ourselves whether we can be faithful to God while being married to a man who has sinned. All of us sin, but only the one who has given her soul to God can fight the battle of the heart and win. A Christian woman must decide to be faithful to God in marrying a godly but flawed man. When she marries, she is not setting herself up for living with his future sins in their marriage; she is trusting in God to be faithful. She is trusting in the man she marries to be faithful to God and, therefore, to her. Suppose a Christian woman married a Christian man who was weak when it came to the sin of covetousness. And after she married him, suppose he stole a car. Would the Church blame the wife? Is it her sin? It is not. She may have to bear the consequences along with him, but she does not bear the guilt. Nor does God place the guilt on His daughters when men commit sexual sins against their wives. The Christian woman’s marriage to a Christian man is an agreement to partner with him to reach Heaven, not to bear the guilt of his wrongs committed against God.
Faithful sister, you have your own body, mind, spirit, and soul. You are given your own choices. When you sin against God, you should feel guilt. That guilt should press on your tender heart and cause you to halt in your path of iniquity. You will want to turn back to God who loves you. Feel guilt, admit to your sin, and stop sinning. Then let the guilt go. You may have to deal with sin’s consequences, but God has not left you. He is not delighting in your circumstances caused by sin. When you are blamed or punished for things you have no control over, Satan will use misplaced guilt to try to enslave you. Give misplaced guilt to God—whether it comes from your conscience or from someone else. Misplaced guilt will keep your spirit and soul from going to your God, it will keep your mouth from confessing, and it will keep your mind from breaking free of sin. Satan will use guilt to keep you out of your Father’s presence, but God overcomes the deepest, most painful of sins to reach you and draw you back to Him.
Here are some passages that teach how God uses guilt to help us grow closer to Him:
For day and night thy hand was heavy upon me: My moisture was changed as with the drought of summer. Selah I acknowledged my sin unto thee, And mine iniquity did I not hide: I said, I will confess my transgressions unto Jehovah; And thou forgavest the iniquity of my sin. Psalm 32:4-5
My son, despise not the chastening of Jehovah; Neither be weary of his reproof: For whom Jehovah loveth he reproveth, Even as a father the son in whom he delighteth. Proverbs 3:11-12
Furthermore, we had the fathers of our flesh to chasten us, and we gave them reverence: shall we not much rather be in subjection unto the Father of spirits, and live? For they indeed for a few days chastened us as seemed good to them; but he for our profit, that we may be partakers of his holiness. All chastening seemeth for the present to be not joyous but grievous; yet afterward it yieldeth peaceable fruit unto them that have been exercised thereby, even the fruit of righteousness. Hebrews 12:9-11
This is the nineteenth post in the Lifting Up the Soul study from Psalm 25. Subscribe to WomEnCourage to be notified as this study continues.